“What’s the best mascot we could use to let people know that Snapchat is a fun app for real-time picture sharing?”
“DEFINITELY the souls of dead people trapped between earth and the afterlife. And, not for nothing? Their mouths should be dripping blood.”
“Uh, pardon me, are you sure your name isn’t Stephen Hawking? Because you are a GENIUS.”
Open Mike Eagle: Im not playing this show tonight because Harvard and Stone is racist against rap music. - I look forward to having Mike on one of my shows again. - Paul
I admit that I use the term ‘racist’ loosely.
In the past i’ve said that my android phone is racist against emojis and that Instagram is racist against Twitter. Aside from it simply being humorous to me, it points out the absurdity of an entity choosing not to operate alongside of another…
Click here to listen to the 4 Year Anniversary celebration of Comedy Bang! Bang! baby!!!!!
And, as always, SCRASH.
I love this a whole lot. - Paul
Paul F. Tompkins Character Alignment Chart
Top row, l-r: Dave, Up All Night; Paul F. Tompkins, Laboring Under Delusions; Cake Boss, Comedy Bang! Bang! Middle row: Prescott, There Will Be Blood; Frank Doyle, The Thrilling Adventure Hour; H.G. Wells, The Dead Authors Podcast Bottom row: Andrew Lloyd Webber, Comedy Bang! Bang! live show; “Paul F. Tompkins,” The L.A. Complex; Furnius, Adventure Time
Honestly can’t tell if this is a double feature or an emotional plea from the sign itself. I’d prefer the latter (I also would have accepted HELP I’M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A MARQUEE FACTORY).
NO YOU DIDN’T “NAIL IT” RICHARD I HATE YOU AND YOUR SPONSOR #twelvesteps